Saturday, September 12, 2009

Strange Traffic

I use to look at the statistics of my page traffic. It allows me to see who comes here, how long they were here, what they clicked on, etc. I was looking over the stats today because I had an enormous amount of first time visitors...over 1,500. I don't know if we're being linked to or written about by some weird website, but if you know anything about this, please fill me in.

As I was trying to figure this mystery out, I happened upon a gentleman from Springfield, Missouri, who at 4:01 PM today visited It's Always Sunny in Orono.

Notice anything strange about his information?

That's right. He typed the phrase "sweet little cunts" into Google, and wound up here. I said to myself, how in the world did that query trigger my blog? So I Googled "sweet little cunts", and sure enough, it was on the first page.

Now, I'm trying to picture this in my head. I'm about to wack off. I have my pants around my ankles and I'm thinking, "you know what I'd love to watch right now? Girls that have sweet little cunts."

So I Google it, scroll all the way down, (because the first 10 fucking websites apparently aren't dirty enough) and read the words SWEET LITTLE 78 YEAR OLD GRAMMY in the description.

I say SWEET, click the link, realize it's not granny porn, and although I have a raging erection and a handful of lotion, I stay there for 37 fucking seconds.

Oh, and it's 4:01 PM.

What a fucked up individual.


  1. Some times I don't know what to say in response to your posts. But I like to respond. So instead, I'll just say grats on the 1500+ haha

  2. holy SHIT brett you need to use more key words that people will search for, maybe just blog up a nice dank list of things people love to search for.....think about it.....and you'll become world famous in 10 minutes flat. i lmfao at this post btw you need to post more often k?


just click "Name/URL" enter your damn name and type ur damn message. but keep in mind i have a fragile ego